are you so shy because you have an std?
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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