If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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