I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize