I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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