I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
