why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
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