Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize