i think i have herpe
just one?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
