She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
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if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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