Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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