I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
