"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
