I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
Randomize
