Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office