awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
