This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
