New low: just hacked my moms facebook
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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