We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
