Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
