Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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