Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
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I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
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I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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