So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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