Texts From Last Night

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  (408): View more from California

  the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW

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  (408): the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW http://tfl.nu/xrjr
  Replies (9) Good night (847) Bad night (2262)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!

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  (813): for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?! http://tfl.nu/r22y
  Replies (51) Good night (6813) Bad night (934)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  he was CRYING into my vagina

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  (410): he was CRYING into my vagina http://tfl.nu/w2tl
  Replies (36) Good night (930) Bad night (11979)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.

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  (717): So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia. http://tfl.nu/uo67
  Replies (46) Good night (2411) Bad night (3459)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.

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  (443): I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from. http://tfl.nu/qa0c
  Replies (11) Good night (5553) Bad night (1176)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT

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  (832): DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT http://tfl.nu/3806
  Replies (17) Good night (4697) Bad night (1131)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing

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  (407): i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing http://tfl.nu/l66q
  Replies (17) Good night (6084) Bad night (1290)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.

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  (605): Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester. http://tfl.nu/t8vg
  Replies (9) Good night (2875) Bad night (1248)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK

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  (570): She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK http://tfl.nu/qbz7
  Replies (9) Good night (2882) Bad night (1117)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.

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  (407): Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer. http://tfl.nu/w1nq
  Replies (8) Good night (778) Bad night (1461)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.

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  (765): I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today. http://tfl.nu/xjgq
  Replies (4) Good night (522) Bad night (1196)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...

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  (765): I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you... http://tfl.nu/t7gx
  Replies (2) Good night (963) Bad night (596)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today

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  (423): can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today http://tfl.nu/jv97
  Replies (3) Good night (968) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby

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  (403): Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby http://tfl.nu/ngks
  Replies (0) Good night (268) Bad night (407)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.

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  (407): This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve. http://tfl.nu/1f06
  Replies (3) Good night (626) Bad night (257)

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