Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate

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  (630) i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate http://tfl.nu/ziyg
  Replies (20) Good night (716) Bad night (1143)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.

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  (630): She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her. http://tfl.nu/01f3
  Replies (12) Good night (5744) Bad night (586)
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  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other

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  (605): I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other http://tfl.nu/boea
  Replies (24) Good night (5652) Bad night (1647)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.

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  (207): I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry. http://tfl.nu/pgeg
  Replies (30) Good night (7088) Bad night (1126)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.

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  (407): it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone. http://tfl.nu/u2hu
  Replies (17) Good night (1431) Bad night (4339)
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.

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  (709): ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome. http://tfl.nu/2x6n
  Replies (8) Good night (4182) Bad night (1012)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.

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  (813): His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up. http://tfl.nu/2dvo
  Replies (1) Good night (2714) Bad night (855)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now

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  (570): Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now http://tfl.nu/j96j
  Replies (41) Good night (6450) Bad night (1175)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us

  (1-630): View more from Illinois

  fair point

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  (630): oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us (1-630): fair point http://tfl.nu/efw3
  Replies (8) Good night (1777) Bad night (872)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.

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  (+44): Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower. http://tfl.nu/m2lh
  Replies (6) Good night (1893) Bad night (456)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday

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  (613): Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday http://tfl.nu/1nci
  Replies (1) Good night (606) Bad night (321)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.

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  (206): I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems. http://tfl.nu/rm1a
  Replies (2) Good night (278) Bad night (417)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.

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  (336): Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups. http://tfl.nu/v7i7
  Replies (6) Good night (842) Bad night (361)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.

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  (416): I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am. http://tfl.nu/zlza
  Replies (18) Good night (468) Bad night (815)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection

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  (573): Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection http://tfl.nu/kohz
  Replies (2) Good night (228) Bad night (304)

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