its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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