please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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