I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Randomize
