as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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