Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
