I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
