The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
