honey bunches of taint.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
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I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
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my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass