I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I cut my penus on the lid.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
