We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
