I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
my poor anus
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize