At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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