Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
my computer doesn't work...
i puked on it last night
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!