lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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