Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
It's never too late to be topless.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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