i think i have herpe
just one?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
