Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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