he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
