Please, let me fuck your mom
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Randomize
