Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
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