I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
