Whoa Z and x make the same sound
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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