I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
