Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize