Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Your penis caused this!
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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