she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
