Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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