just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
